Not THEM Monday: Oh No They Didn't!!!

This week, it's all about the kids:

• I took the kids into Brooklyn this past week to get Austin a much needed haircut. While there, I did not look up to see Audrey performing a stage dance for all of the old ladies getting their hair done. This dance did not include lots of hip shaking and butt slapping, and I most certainly did not take credit for teaching her all of her savvy dance moves.
• Speaking of my middle child, her teacher did not gently suggest that we start working on "listening and focusing on the teacher during class time". Apparently my social butterfly is more concerned about scheduling multiple playdates with all of her new friends than she is about circle time. I was not absolutely impressed that it actually took 3 full weeks of school before we had an "incident".
• After repeated efforts to get the girls settled down and asleep one nite last week, I did not walk past their room yet again to see Lexi sitting up in bed playing. She did not see me look in but she must have realized that she was about to get busted. Because on my return pass, I did not glance in to see her laying flat out in bed, eyes scrunched tightly shut "sleeping" with a half smile on her face.
• Audrey's first official homework assignment last week was to bring in 3 small objects that started with the letter "B". We buh~buh~buh~rainstormed several ideas including buh~buh~buh~ubbles, buh~buh~buh~ook, and buh~buh~buh~ear. Buh~buh~buh~ut it wasn't till big buh~buh~buh~rother got involved that she gathered up a buh~buh~buh~racelet, buh~buh~buh~utton, and a buh~buh~buh~one. As in a gnawed on chicken bone from dinner. I did not actually put it in a ziplock bag and let her take it in and I certainly did not consider writing Mrs. W a note explaining that big brother had helped with the project.
• The kids were outside Thursday nite playing while I got dinner around. I had both the garage and front doors open so that I could keep an eye on them. At some point, I did not hear Lexi whine, "I'm telling on you!" to which I did NOT hear Austin reply, "let's pretend that just didn't happen." Apparently she "pretended" because I never got report of that particular offense. Although several minutes later I did glance out to see Austin playing dodge ball with his BASEBALL. Perhaps he beaned her and she didn't take too kindly to that?
• Audrey did not walk into the bathroom where I was getting ready one morning with her shirt hiked up and her little bear firmly pressed into her chest. She did not inform me that her bear was "sucking on her booby to drink milk" and then proceed to breastfeed it for several minutes until she pronounced it "not thirsty anymore". I am still wondering where this all came from, as it's been over 2 years since I have raised my shirt to offer liquid refreshment to a baby. One thing I do know is that she is going to be a stellar mother someday!=)

Happy Monday, all!!!