...And I'm Spent

Well, it's real... I'm officially unemployed. All week I've been holding out secret hope that they'd be calling me, begging me to come back because they can't possibly find someone else to clean their toilets for them. No such luck. Tom used the last of his vacation time for the year and took a half day, which meant I was able to get an early start on the store (and the rest of my life). I arrived while everyone was still working, but I was able to clean the bathrooms and find other stuff to do until they all headed home for the nite.

Ok, maybe I was being overly sensitive but I thought it was pretty obvious that I was present and accounted for in the building. Heck, I was even vacuuming so I wasn't exactly being quiet. But the dear lady that wrote the lovely little notice I received last week in place of a Christmas bonus turned the lights off on me before leaving for the nite. Umm, helloooo?!?!? I get about as much respect as the toilets I clean(ed). Then, after having cleaned for over an hour and a half, I walked into her office and didn't see my check in it's usual spot. I wasn't exactly thinking happy Christmas thoughts and I'd more than likely ruin my Christian testimony if I even hint at the various phrases and 4 letter words that were running through my mind=). Ha ha- see I can even laugh at my psychotic frame of mind now. I called my mom, sobbing, to vent and ask her what I should do. Do I keep cleaning and hope that they pay me one last time? Did I read the letter wrong and my last week was actually last week? By the time I exclaimed that they were just messing with my mind I was nearly hysterical. Of course nice lady's husband walked through the office at about that time and probably heard my whole rant. Niiice. (I had NO idea he was still there.) I hung up from talking to my mom and cornered him in a back office to demand to know what was going on. He called nice lady to confirm that in fact I wasn't done until the 1st, so, yes, go ahead and clean. If I wasn't so desperate for every single penny I would have just walked out, but $250 is $250, ya know?!

I did receive my check in the mail today. So now I have exactly 6 days until my family starts feeling the financial pinch. So far here's my list of options:

• Do nothing. Trust that God will provide by stretching Tom's paycheck twice as much (like the story in the Bible about the jars overflowing with oil).
• Start using the credit cards... again.
• Tap into the kids' savings accounts. Oops, did that last time and never had the extra money to replace the funds. Scratch that idea.
• Hold out until the "perfect" job comes along.
• Sell my plasma as often as possible.
• Donate my eggs to research. (We all know I'm plenty fertile). I've seen ads offering up to $3000.
• Don't eat so that my kids will have more on their plates. This might be a way to lose the extra poundage.
• Time visits to family members so that we "happen" to drop in around dinner time. *Note to self- call ahead first to see what's being served.*
• Respond to the ad in the paper from a local preschool looking for a teacher to start January 11. This could be a whole post in itself, but to make a long story short, it's 30 teaching hours/week (not to mention driving time, prep time, etc., etc.) If my kids were all in school, I would jump at the chance; but they're not which leaves me to wonder who I would find to be their mom while I'm off being career woman. Plus, I haven't taught in 5 years, I would have 3 classes (1- 3 year old am, 1- 4 year old am, and 1- 4 year old pm), I'd only have less than 2 weeks to pull something out of my butt in terms of lessons, etc., etc.- Aaaahhhhh!!!!! Listen to me freak out. I haven't even dusted off my resume and I'm spazing like the job is already mine.

I'm really dense when it comes to figuring out God's plan for my life. I usually barrel ahead with my plans and assume that when things fall into place it's because it's all part of God's plan. Maybe it is, but this time I want to be really, really sure. Pray that He makes His plan so super clear that it's just really OBVIOUS. And I'll keep you posted, you know I will.